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ManFlu is ComingThe truth and REAL FACTS about MANFLU!

Since last Monday I picked up a bad cold.  It’s now Wednesday and I’m still dying.  I woke up on Monday with a sore throat and by Monday afternoon I was starting to collapse & went to bed at 6 o’clock.  I had to prepare a tender yesterday, so I had to get up.  All I wanted was to get back to bed, have a few hot whiskeys (for medicinal purposes) with some lemon and paracetamol.  Now for a guy who goes to bed at 1 or 2 am, that’s unusual (you could write a song about that) and on top of that, here I am writing an article.  I must be a martyr!

Loreto doesn’t see my condition as being serious so I decided to check it on the internet and discovered that 52% of women lose sympathy with their sick partner within five minutes of him starting to complain. A further 18% do not even make it that long – they start off unsympathetic and continue in the same vein.  Now, if you put the shoe on the other foot, 70% of men claim to be sympathetic if their partner is complaining of a cold with 64% of men claiming they will cook dinner for their sick partners and 60% claiming they will do the housework.  Aren’t we brilliant?

manflu“Man Flu is a crippling and debilitating disorder indiscriminately striking down male members of the human species without warning. The illness is often referred to pejoratively by female members of the species who are in fact immune from the illness as man flu is now known to exclusively attack the XY chromosome carrier. If Man Flu is kind enough not to kill the infected party it will definitely leave him weak, sick, hurting everywhere and in dire need of TLC. “

“It is a rare strain of flu so powerful and so deadly it can only be matched by the Bubonic Plague and Aids. An incurable virus which has adapted to only effect the "XY" gene found in men. The virus attacks the immune system 10,000 times harder than the average flu virus, causing excruciating pain for the victim. Man Flu has no cure and prayers can save the forsaken life of the infected. The often deadly virus is mostly laughed at by women who sadly cannot contract Man Flu”

Woman: Is he ok?
Doctor: I'm afraid not, I'm sorry to say he has Man Flu

“Man flu, a term used to address a flu-like illness exclusive to men. Often 'man flu' is a term that is subject to ridicule and scepticism, the actual existence of it doubted. It is often assumed by others, namely women, as a namby pamby excuse used by their boyfriends, fathers, male work colleagues and sons to predominantly to get out of responsibilities. “

manflu“It is not the female equivalent of the menstrual cycle, but that won't stop men afflicted with it to act like they need to be babied constantly or sympathised with. Men are expected to be strong and dependable: the stereotype of what a real man is. For men to claim to have a moment of weakness for one moment in the eyes of a woman, God forbid, will raise the Q - are you a man or a mouse? “

Before all you women out there get smug and think that us long suffering men are faking it, let me give you the REAL FACTS.

The University of Queensland carried out a survey of 63 healthy volunteers and published their findings after lab tests to examine the immune responses. The bugs that usually cause the common cold are called rhinoviruses and the Australian researchers found that female volunteers had a much stronger immune response to them.  However, after the menopause, that protection disappeared.  Aww

Prof John Upham, of the University of Queensland, said:

“It makes sense from a biological point of view because women are more likely to ensure the survival of the species. We noticed that when women reached menopause, their improved resistance to rhinoviruses faded away. So hormones obviously play a huge part in helping fight viruses."

There are mixed messages to men from the medical profession.  Men are being told to go to the doctor with their ailments and to stop being so macho.  On the other hand, we are being told to stop whinging and being so wimpish when we have a cold or flu and to get on with it.

Professor Tom O'Dowd, Professor of General Practice in Trinity College Dublin, did some research on 100 men asking them what would they do with some chest pain. One third of them said they would walk it off.  That could be fatal, yet we can get chest infections, therefore pain, with manflu and we are being told to stop whinging.  

Men can't win.

"Children get colds, men get manflu and women get on with it"

So there you have it, we do suffer from Man Flu.  Don’t we?

And, to top it off, Loreto sent me this video. . .

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 Update - April 2016:

I'm in bed again with damn manflu. We're getting a new bathroom fitted and there is no way you can go to bed when workmen are hammering and banging and coming in and out of the bedroom. Totally weakened and feeling sorry for myself now. The doc told me that I have sinusitis and a chest infection.  And, she can't guarantee it won't get any worse. Charming. Ah well, I suppose it's the only time the 2 girls in my life pamper me.  I hope to be back in work on Monday.  Loreto was so sick she had to come home from work during the week with it.  The doc gave her a cert for a week which lasts until Thursday this week.  Being made from pure steel, she's back in work this morning, Monday.  Of course, she picked it up from her work colleagues who came into work infected with colds and spread it around. But that's another story.

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